Growing up is scary.

Dear Diary,

Today is life changing. But I'm not sure if this is good or bad.

Since this year 2012 started, I've been slacking with everything in my life that I haven't thought about my real life priorities. I'm kind of person who enjoys every single day as it is. Cherishing each moment and not letting each day pass without appreciating how great life is. With that in mind, I forgot that I have set of responsibilities to be taken care of, for my family's future. I'll be soon a breadwinner of our family but I still think I lack the maturity of a young adult. And to be honest, all these changes that are bound to happen are pressuring me. It's really scary.

So many things are happening in our family right now. Let's say, we're having a life crisis or some sort. And we had the talk after hearing the mass. In our family, I'm the eldest and the quiet type when it comes to serious matters. I don't just react, I think first before saying anything. And as I listen to my mom and my sister talking (my Dad died when I was in 6th grade), I realized that my family will soon depend on me. All my relatives are expecting me to help mom financially and act more like an adult now. I don't really have a problem with that. I knew this would happen but I was just caught off guard. I didn't thought that all these changes would come sooner than soon. But I ain't complaining! I love my life and my family which is why I'm willing to leap an extra mile for them. :)

Before going to bed, I've been thinking of my future plans. What I should do and must accomplish within 5years. Hmmm. Maybe I'll list down a 5-year bucket list here! I think that would help me a bit with all my worries. There are just so many things running in my mind right now and it's frustrating. I'm still on vacay and yet I'm stressed out already. Oh dear, I'm too young for all these!!! Haha :))

Today is also a special day for ze boyfriend and I. Hihi! :"> I slept over in his place last night after attending his childhood friend's party. We went to the party with his sister and his sister's boyfriend. It was fun! We drank Jägermeister and it was my first time to try it. Uggghh, it gave my throat and stomach an eerie kind of warmth. See how innocent my body reacts with alcohol? Lol. Good thing, I know how to control myself and didn't end up drunk by the end of the night. Cheers to that! :P

Sorry if this post seems to have ideas scattered all over. My thoughts are out of order at the moment and it's crazyyy. Haha Please bare with me, thank you! :>


One bothered young lady,
Secret Diary Keeper


P.S. The number 3 is a very special number for ze boyfriend and I. :')